Wednesday, October 6, 2010

It's Been Forever!

Well, lots of changes have been taking place in my life and now that I'm at a halfway point with the approval process, I feel comfortable in saying that I am soon to get the Lap-Band. For those of you who are unfamiliar with the process, a surgeon will cut 5 small incision, insert laparoscopic tools into my abdomen and place a synthetic band around the top of my stomach. The band has a fill-able balloon encompassing the inside and it is filled with sterile saline to control the amount of food being taking in to the stomach.

At this point I have tried natural methods such as exercise, yoga and a controlled diet. The problem is that I plateau so quickly that I lose about 10lbs then my body adjusts to the changes. The body is built for famine so it uses whatever resources available to keep you sustained.

And, oh the other things I have tried, fad diets, pills, supplements, drinks and the list goes on. This is the safest best option for me. I wish everyone would go to one of the seminars and get educated on obesity before they write it off as  a lack of self control, it's so much more than that. 

Anyway, I wanted to keep everyone informed of the changes in my life, both now and in the near future. So, that's the future news...let's talk about now!

I have recently dropped out of Graphic Design classes to figure out what I really want to be when I grow up. I've always had a love for mission work and helping the homeless so I'm going to be talking to the head of a local homeless shelter to find out how to take it from volunteer work to a career. I'm hoping to be on a trip to Haiti in February if I can raise the money, if you so wish to donate, let me know! 

Other than that, I'm just loving life! I'm trying to work as much as possible to save money for Haiti and trying to do some fun extra curricular activities! This is my time!!! 

Tuesday, June 8, 2010


Wow, yes I'm still alive, lol.

I'm pretty sure I have gained back what I lost in the beginning but I decided that I need more help than what I was doing before. So, I am beginning a new plan that will still include my yoga and exercise as well as a dietary aid to shed some of my LB's a little quicker. Once I have off some of my excess weight I'll be able to increase my activity level. Right now with the size I am, the strain on my body is too much to work out more than I had been.

So, discouragement aside, I'm going to give it a try again and see what happens, fingers crossed that I will see a big difference in the next 6 months! I think everyone who knows me, knows that I am NOT a patient person, but I know that weight loss comes slowly if you do it the healthy, back on the wagon I am and as always, updates will be coming much more frequently!

Thanks for encouraging me guys!

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

So...I'm officially off the wagon in a big way :(

I don't think I've re-gained much, but I hadn't lost much either. Truth is, I'm too busy right now. So, I see my summer being consumed with being making myself renewed. I definitely plan on losing 20lbs in the next 4 months...totally doable!

Anyway, have you ever had one of those discouraging times when it seems like 12 other people decide to go on a diet exactly when you do and two weeks later are down 2 dress sizes and 45lbs? lol....that's how I'm feeling. Deciding not to do a crash diet produces long term results and a change in my life style. Unfortunately it also means the weight comes off slower. So be it. 

Just keep encouraging me guys, school is out officially on Friday after portfolio review drop-off...then my summer begins...and hopefully ends with a healthier, slimmer, happier me!

Thursday, April 15, 2010

One more thing!

Oh, and it's not cute or chic to smoke. It's harmful, not only to ourselves but to others. I'm not being hypocritical, up until the end of January I had been smoking on and off for probably 5 years +, but now that I am giving a healthy lifestyle a whirl it seems pointless. 

I was looking at this photographer who takes peoples purses/bags/backpacks and empties them out in an orderly grid system and takes photos of them and their items.

What amazed me was the amount of cute, trendy, artsy girls/guys who had cigs in their bags and for a split second it made me want to smoke again...for a second. But then I remembered they are harmful and just icky!  I just wanted to say that it's not cute or chic or sexy or trendy or artsy, just gross! lol

The Little Things...

Well, still plugging away, doing my thang! I'm just enjoying the way I feel, the weight loss is secondary to the healthy choices I'm making! Here's a couple things I've noticed:

1. I don't really enjoy drinking soda anymore. Sunday's are my cheat day so I thought I would get a fully leaded Dr. Pepper. over half of it is still in my refrigerator!

2. I was afraid that cheat day would make me feel like I was missing something. I had a waffle for breakfast on was wonderful, it felt like I was treating myself instead of just having a waffle for breakfast.

3. Soup and salad actually taste good. Lol, I found myself eating my salad the other day while my co-workers were enjoying chicken strips, french fries, pizza, roast beef and gravy; and actually saying out loud "Wow, this salad is really good!" and I meant it!!!

4. Routine, routine, routine. I've discovered that my eating routine is more important than my workout routine. If I don't get my cheerios, banana, coffee breakfast at work I feel off, same with my salad/soup lunch. But my workout is more flexible. On my off day of working out I took my pup for a walk. I still take the stairs everywhere. I walk more, I can find other ways to burn calories, but my caloric intake change is huge to my success.

5. I'm not really a stress eater, however, I am a BORED eater! lol, so now we carry trail mix in the house which is full of protein and fiber!

Ok, so there's my discoveries about life since THE CHANGE haha!

I'm still going. Sometime the scale doesn't reflect what I'm doing, but that's ok. Throughout the day your weight can fluctuate up to 2lbs up or down, so I don't stress over the scale. All these little things I have done are life changing and will lead me to a healthier lifestyle. I may not have lost 20lbs on a crash diet, but in 5 years, hopefully I'll be down 100+ lbs and have the resources to keep it off without it being a constant struggle! It's all about healthy choices and habits!

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

So, this is kind of cool, if you've never been chunky you won't understand this, but for the first time in probably a decade I found out yesterday that I cannot see my belly over by boobs. ROFL. I was on the elevator at work and I was like "Holy crap, I have to lean over to see my belly!" Ha! It's the small thing...let's all remember that. It doesn't matter what my scale says. I feel a major difference and now I'm beginning to see a difference. Ok, that's all for now!!! 

Have an awesome day everyone!!!


Wednesday, April 7, 2010

For the first time...

Sorry I haven't blogged much lately! It's been crazy! But something very cool happened to me, yesterday I had someone tell me I look like I'd lost weight. It was awesome. She said there was more definition in my waist and that my profile looked slimmer. It was great! I'm not expecting a huge amount of compliments yet...but it was definitely sweet!
This is a slow moving process, about a pound a week. Everything I've ever seen has said that's a healthy weight to lose at a time, it's just hard to be super excited every week about a pound, lol! But, it's a feeling, it's the way things feel and clothes look on me now. I haven't gone down a size, lol, I haven't even lost 10lbs yet but I will :) and that's the best feeling of all!

Thursday, April 1, 2010

30 Days Strong!

Well, today was 30 days since I started my new initiative. I think I'm down about 4lbs which is almost right where I wanted to be. A pound a week sounds like a good plan.

After I rebounded from my horrible week, I lost all that I gained plus a few more ounces for good measure! lol. I try to weigh only in the early morning so that it's all even and I have a better chance to be accurate. I've also added an extra few mins to my workout time effective today. I'm sure I covered this before but in case I haven't the plan I'm doing is on the Wii Fit. It has been wonderful for me and I can already feel the improvement in my core muscles and my posture. 

So, what do I think at this mini milestone? I think that it's awesome that I'm actually doing it. I've never been this determined before (well, except in school) to better myself. How awesome it's been! I love the way I feel and what it's done to my emotional well-being also.

Ok, headed to school, got to finish up some projects! :)

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Laughing Out Loud

Well, I knew the fast food last week was a bad idea!!! lol, but it's one week. It was a bad week for my diet, but still one week. This week has already been much better. I gained instead of lost last week which means I won't meet my 2lb goal for loss but the great thing is that I am DETERMINED and ready to keep going! Besides, getting in to a routine, adjusting to different meals/workouts and breaking lots of old, bad habits is gonna take some time. I've done really well and I'm proud of myself for starting up again this week because honestly, I wanted to quit when I wrote my last blog post. It just seemed easier to keep living the way I was. It's so easy because I'm extremely healthy right now to say "Oh, you don't need to worry about it for awhile! You're healthy," but the thing I HAVE to focus on is my future. If I keep going on like this, I will be unhealthy. That's not an over-exaggeration, it's a fact.

I have been over 200lbs since I was probably 12 years old. That means that I have spent half of my life at least 70lbs overweight and if I'm being honest most of that time I have spent being about 150lbs overweight. That's a whole other person that I have hanging on me causing wear and tear to my bones and joints and also extra strain on my heart and lungs, not to mention the fat that has probably started to build in my arteries and around my liver. 

Lol, ok, enough with all the medical things that are happening. The truth is, I have not been able to shop in a regular department store, well, ever that I can recall. I'm sure when I was little I could but that was my parent shopping for me. I have never been able to go to a mall and just browse through a store that wasn't a dignified PLUS SIZE shop. Just thinking about when I will be able to do that made me tear up. My goal is a long time out but it's a beautiful one. I don't want to be skinny, in fact I never will, just not made to be, but I will be healthy, I will be fit and I will be able to walk into a mall and buy clothes in whatever store I want.

30 lbs in 2010. That's what I want to lose. Seems like an easy goal. But it won't be easy. I get a feeling that with all the changes I have made that first 30 is gonna seem like, but I will do it. You all have helped me so much. It's pretty cool that so many people have read my blog and I want to thank you for it! You guys rock!

Ok, time to get in the shower and head to school! Can't wait to develop my film from photography!!! 

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Four words...


What a horrible week I had...not in life just in my diet/exercise routine. I'm sure I didn't lose anything this week...ICK!!! I will get back on the wagon asap! This is getting turned around now...

Yeah, that's all!

Friday, March 26, 2010

Defeat...well, not really

Ok, so this week as been terrible as far as my fitness/health routine was concerned. Mom spent the majority of the week at home which meant I was faced with my arch nemesis most of the week...FAST FOOD...dun dun dun!!!  So, needless to say the diet had a rough week. The thing is, I don't feel as good when I eat that crap...I'm learning that my body loves healthy food, food with lots of vitamins, minerals and if my stupid brain and tastebuds would get their act together!!! lol

Anyhow, I decided to work out three days, rest one, work out three, rest one, you get the idea. I think it will be better for my body if I rest every three. I'll also be doing cardio, strength training, cardio so that everything is getting a nice workout and I'm focusing on cardio. That's what my body needs until I can shed some pounds and start the more intense strength and weight training.

Ok, so I'm completely exhausted...back on the wagon tomorrow!!! The most important thing is knowing that even though I'm having a crappy week in the diet/exercise department, is that I'm gonna keep going. That's something that I am sure of...this is a commitment for my future and it's gonna be hard, but worth it.

Oh, and I haven't forgotten about my controversial blog post...just haven't had a chance to write it!!! 

Thursday, March 25, 2010

New day, new view...

Well, I think I've made the decision to work out 3 days, rest 1 day. I think that will keep me motivated and rested throughout the week. 

In other news, I'm in week 3 of my weight loss journey and this is the first week where I want to eat everything sweet and salty in sight! lol...I've done ok, could have done better and will do better today, but yesterday was I managed to have salad for lunch and a small salad before dinner so I felt a little better. The good thing is that in our house everything sweet is sugar free so it's a little better anyway. 

I weigh myself once a week but my goals are set up for two weeks. I was a little discouraged because when I did my weekly weigh in yesterday I'd only lost .2lbs. That means I need to lose 1.8lbs to get my goal by next week. Still achievable, just a little harder to get there. I started a new medication which may be adding to the problem so hopefully I'll be adjusted to it soon!!!

But, no excuses...I just haven't been eating like I should have :(.... so, I'm considering joining Weigh Watchers. It's something that I'm hoping me and my Mom can do together. We are very close but I think being on this path together would only bring us closer and make us both healthier.

Anywho...I'll be posting later on about something that some people may not be aware of but is something that touches all of us everyday, bet you can't guess it. 

Headed to school to get an edukashin.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010


I took my measurements and was appalled by what I saw but it'll change! I think that part that bothered me was when I converted the inches into feet...ick! So here goes...I wasn't going to post this but I said I was gonna be honest here! So my measurements are as follows :(

Waist - 48"
Hip - 55"
Bust - 51"
Band - 45"
Thigh - 26"
Calf - 19"
Biceps - 14"

Bleh bleh...but it'll change...I can already feel the difference in myself everyday, just can't wait for the rest of my body to catch up!!!!

Ok, well now time to head to school....not gonna dwell on these measurements.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Ok, well the diet is on hold for today...I probably re-gained every ounce that I lost, lol! But, it's ok...I worked out this morning and will tomorrow morning!

But, yay for me...I lost 4oz since I weighed yesterday which brought my total 2week weight loss to 3lbs 1oz! That's a full lb and 1 oz over my goal weight loss for the week!!! 

Started the day listening to some of my favorite Irishmen (and Scotsmen) Celtic Thunder, then some Dropkick Murphy's while I got ready to go. We all sang on the way to lunch at O'Neill's on 95th and had an awesome time with my Mom and Sis. We came home and watched movies and enjoyes a wonderful corned beef and cabbage dinner! Thanks Sis!!!

The hardest part about today...missing my Daddy. He loved St. Patrick's day and I loved to watch him embarrass my sister and mom with his terrible leprechaun accent while we would shop in Shehan's or go to breakfast on St. Pats. 

                                                                    this was taken in March in love!

Well, enough sad...I had a wonderful day and I hope everyone else did too! Even if you're not Irish, you can be today! We welcome you all with love in our hearts and stout in our hands!

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Patience, who me? lol

Ok, ok! I mentioned that I'm not patient at all, which proved all too true when I was working out today and decided to do my weigh in a day early! But...good news!

I'm down 1.5lbs in 6days!!!!!! Which means that in 13 days I am down 2.13lbs which is 13oz over my goal!!! And my goal isn't until tomorrow!!! YAY!!!! What an encouragement! Seriously, there are some tears in my eyes as I type this! 

Here's my big questions...should I take a couple days off a week to rest? I feel better overall when I workout everyday and my regime has been this:

Both are 30min workouts
Day A
Strength Training

Day B

So, I'm alternating between these days and I've been taking one day off, usually Sunday just to rest because I work all Sundays and I'm usually wiped out! lol

So, let me know what you think, 6 days a week, or less?

Peace and much love,

Monday, March 15, 2010

Once upon a time there was a little girl on spring break...

And she spent it working...NOPE! Lol, I am off for the next 3 days and I plan to enjoy myself! Can't wait for diet won't exist for St. Patrick's Day, so I may need some encouragement to get back on the horse Thursday!!! I don't even think I'm gonna put my food on here for the past few days...too tiring. I feel like crap because I couldn't work out last night or tonight :( I can't wait to get back to it early in the morning. I am LOVING the way it makes me feel! 

The hardest thing for me right now is patience. Patience is not my strong suit and though I have gotten better in the recent memory at being patient this is really hard for me. Not seeing immediate results. Thank goodness for all the encouragement though, everyone has been wonderful and really made it easy for me to talk about it all.

I feel like I'm doing great though. I make it a point to take the stairs at work now, with one exception. I take the elevator when I get there in the morning @ 6:45 am! I can't do it that early! The great thing is, it's 6 flights of stairs to get from the cafeteria to my floor to eat. Makes me pick my food a little differently.  Doing this ensures that I take 12 flights of stairs down and more importantly 12 flights of stairs up everyday! I feel great knowing that it's a little something extra I can do at work.

Cravings aren't too horrible. I discovered that in the afternoon a Clif bar or a piece of fruit and my Crystal light are working well. However it's the late night that's killing me! I know I can do this, it IS the hardest commitment I've ever made but I think I'm up to the challenge, I just have to keep looking forward to a healthy future!

Peace and much love!

Thursday, March 11, 2010

Proud to be me!

Ok, well I had to work, which meant no working out in the morning, which is my preference. I work the 6:45am - 7:15pm shift for those of you who don't know!  The day was great. I told a few people about my plans, some already knew from FB but I want encouragement all over the place so there were some people who needed to know. This also got the funniest comment so far. 

While telling my friend who is thin and tall about my plans she said "But I thought you were all proud of being a fat chick" lol! Not, exactly my feelings! It made me laugh so hard though! I am proud of myself, I have always been a confident girl. I dress well, I take care of myself, I wear bling and nice clothes and makeup. I make it work with what I have. But here's what it boils down to.

In a decade, am I going to be healthy and happy or fat and lazy? 

I want my children (someday!) to know their Mom can go play in the front yard with them or get down on the floor and wrestle. I want to be healthy for them, not just to be with them but also as an example. But most of all, I've watched my Mom struggle so much. Now that she's getting older it's so hard for her to do things. I want this for me...and for her, I know how proud it would make her. 



Me and Mom, unretouched! At the movies!

So, I'm also gonna put on here my daily meals. Maybe I can get some feedback on what works and what doesn't!

   Large coffee from home w/Coconut Coffee Mate (this won't change, so don't even try!)
   1 serving of plain Cheerios w/3 packets of Equal
   1 medium banana
   3 slices of turkey bacon
   1 pint of skim milk.

Probably could have lived with 2 slices of bacon :)

   Salad (iceberg lettuce, baby carrots, mushrooms, black olives, roasted pumpkin seeds, egg, cheese, italian dressing)
   left over spaghetti (whole wheat spaghetti, lean hamburger, Italian sausage, black olives, marinara)
   left over baked formaggio (italian cheeses baked with black olives on small bread rounds)
   started 34oz of water w/1 packet Crystal Light

   Clif bar (crunchy peanut)
   finished Crystal Light

   Pancakes with light syrup 
   Med slice of ham
   33 oz of water w/Crystal light + fiber

  Light ice cream :)

Ok, so I didn't get to work out yesterday because we had kids over, which will be the case all Wednesdays and Mondays I work. May just have to bite the bullet and wake up at 4:30am! Ha! But it makes me feel so much better! Ok, let me know your thoughts!

Peace and Much love!

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

In the beginning...

Well, here we go. I'm not hiding anything on here, so if you don't want to know personal stuff about Moi...STOP READING HERE...


Go away...

You don't even want to know!

You're still reading???

Ok, good. If you're still with me, here goes. I'm 24 years old and for most of my life (probably all) I have been considered obese. Having said that, I love myself. I'm gorgeous, I don't need any affirmation on that part! The thing is, as I get older I realize certain things...I don't want to be one of those parents who can't get down on the floor and play with their kids. I want to be able to take a flight of stairs without sweating my ass off! I want to wear some high heels and not feel like my feet are on fire after 20mins. The most important thing is I want to be happy! If you know me, you know I am a VERY happy person, but since I started this journey 6 days ago, my life has been AMAZING. I am feeling better, happier, healthier and even more energetic (I know, you didn't think it could happen!) 

I have a wonderful support system of people who are all being so incredibly encouraging and helpful but this blog is for me...just me. If I get some followers, awesome! I hope that we can share a little bit in our lives and help each other out...if not, who cares? I'm in this for the long haul and for me.

I'm 24 years old and I weigh 284lbs as of today (I don't have measurement but I'll get them. I wear a size 24 pant, kind of ironic. My goal is to have lost 30lbs by January 1st, 2011. I have lost 1.8lbs in the 6 days since I started my new life. I am proud of myself for doing this. It's probably the biggest commitment I've ever made to myself...scratch IS the biggest commitment I've ever made to myself and I plan to keep it.

Peace and much love,