Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Laughing Out Loud

Well, I knew the fast food last week was a bad idea!!! lol, but it's one week. It was a bad week for my diet, but still one week. This week has already been much better. I gained instead of lost last week which means I won't meet my 2lb goal for loss but the great thing is that I am DETERMINED and ready to keep going! Besides, getting in to a routine, adjusting to different meals/workouts and breaking lots of old, bad habits is gonna take some time. I've done really well and I'm proud of myself for starting up again this week because honestly, I wanted to quit when I wrote my last blog post. It just seemed easier to keep living the way I was. It's so easy because I'm extremely healthy right now to say "Oh, you don't need to worry about it for awhile! You're healthy," but the thing I HAVE to focus on is my future. If I keep going on like this, I will be unhealthy. That's not an over-exaggeration, it's a fact.

I have been over 200lbs since I was probably 12 years old. That means that I have spent half of my life at least 70lbs overweight and if I'm being honest most of that time I have spent being about 150lbs overweight. That's a whole other person that I have hanging on me causing wear and tear to my bones and joints and also extra strain on my heart and lungs, not to mention the fat that has probably started to build in my arteries and around my liver. 

Lol, ok, enough with all the medical things that are happening. The truth is, I have not been able to shop in a regular department store, well, ever that I can recall. I'm sure when I was little I could but that was my parent shopping for me. I have never been able to go to a mall and just browse through a store that wasn't a dignified PLUS SIZE shop. Just thinking about when I will be able to do that made me tear up. My goal is a long time out but it's a beautiful one. I don't want to be skinny, in fact I never will, just not made to be, but I will be healthy, I will be fit and I will be able to walk into a mall and buy clothes in whatever store I want.

30 lbs in 2010. That's what I want to lose. Seems like an easy goal. But it won't be easy. I get a feeling that with all the changes I have made that first 30 is gonna seem like, but I will do it. You all have helped me so much. It's pretty cool that so many people have read my blog and I want to thank you for it! You guys rock!

Ok, time to get in the shower and head to school! Can't wait to develop my film from photography!!! 


Pazz said...

That's a really good attitude to have, Jordan. You gotta pick back up and try again the next day, next week. You only quit when you stop keep on trying! -Vong

The Mini - Maker said...

I know EXACTLY how you feel. I have been "plus-sized" for .... forever. I am telling you... if you calorie count, you WILL lose the weight quicker... and it isn't hard, at all..... because it's not about the "can't have" or the "not allowed" ... it's about staying within your calorie goal each day... Tim and I have each lost 20lbs since Jan. 18, 2010...
Think about it. :)
But no matter what, I'm proud of you, I love you, and I KNOW what you're going through :)